Hola Familia e Amigos!! Como Vi?
This week has been something. P-day is always our lucky day. That day we were supposed to teach Jhosylene who only lets us in if we have Kimberly. We waited for ever for Kimberly who never showed up. We went to other housees and no one was home. Not one lesson. And everyone was really grumpy when we contacted them. We went home, and then I woke up on Tuesday feeling like a truck hit me. Que triste, ne? I was Mrs. Grinch to my companion and then she and Sister Bradshaw taught an awesome feux lesson for their training, and I was so jealous. I started to cry and cry. I had myself a pity party. I was just in a separate room listening to music. They probably thought I was so weird. Then we had to go to district meeting, and I looked like a puffed up blow fish. We had an awesome companionship inventory (mostly me boohooing and apologizing for being such a jerk) and then we went to teach Sandra Acosta and then we were going to teach ANdres. We were feeling so horrible about it but we knew we had to go and do. And they weren't home! The only time I was glad someone wasn't there. Oh dear. That's horrible.
And then we went to talk to this woman in our ward who can not spick an ounce of English and talks super quickly. We were so scared. But we prayed super hard that we could understand, and we did. It was an awesome lesson and she is so awesome. After we taught her though, I needed to throw up. So I did. Haha. But I was like, the work must continue! So we went to talk to the Barretos (the Portuguese family) and I taught them in Portuguese, but it was a super bad idea. We drove home stopping at the side of the rode, me holding a napkin to throw up in if we couldn't stop, and then I got home and threw up for hours. And fifteen hours later, I woke up in my skirt and shirt and shoes. And some stanky breath. That day I really wanted to work, but my companions were all like, nooooooooo. I was only dry heaving. So I decided to pray. I said: "Heavenly Father, should I rest or should I go to work?" ANd I opened the scriptures (they hold the answer to everything of course) and in every paragraph it said the word "rest". Well! Pooey! So that was my answer.
And apparantly it was good, because it was let's have a therapy session with Sister Powell day or "now I have an excuse to get a blessing and just say Sister Powell needed one" day. Nah, it was good. I loved talking to Sister Green and later my second split with Sister Bradshaw. THey are wonderful and I need a therapy session and a blessing too. They definetly needed one:) I am really nervous about transfers and going to Brazil (especially no that there is apparantly a war going on there. That will probably hurt the Visa Process!) And I have to admit, during my sickly time, I wasn't being too missionary like. I don't get why the closer we get to being Christlike, the more we see our weaknesses. It's super frustrating! You don't have to be super bad, but there is something to always change. Constant repentance and changing seems to be always a little heartbreaking at first but uplifting at the end! It's like Nephi's psalm. Read it! Here! I'll just force y'all too:)
Nevertheless, notwithstanding the great agoodness of the Lord, in showing me his great and marvelous works, my heart exclaimeth: O bwretched man that I am! Yea, my heart csorroweth because of my flesh; my soul grieveth because of mine iniquities. 18 I am encompassed about, because of the temptations and the sins which do so easily abeset me.
19 And when I desire to rejoice, my heart groaneth because of my sins; nevertheless, I know in whom I have atrusted.
20 My God hath been my asupport; he hath led me through mine bafflictions in the wilderness; and he hath preserved me upon the waters of the great deep.
21 He hath filled me with his alove, even unto the bconsuming of my flesh.
22 He hath confounded mine aenemies, unto the causing of them to quake before me.
23 Behold, he hath heard my cry by day, and he hath given me aknowledge by bvisions in the night-time.
24 And by day have I waxed bold in mighty aprayer before him; yea, my voice have I sent up on high; and angels came down and ministered unto me.
25 And upon the wings of his Spirit hath my body been acarried away upon exceedingly high mountains. And mine eyes have beheld great things, yea, even too great for man; therefore I was bidden that I should not write them.
26 O then, if I have seen so great things, if the Lord in his condescension unto the children of men hath avisited men in so much bmercy, cwhy should my dheart weep and my soul linger in the valley of sorrow, and my flesh waste away, and my strength slacken, because of mine afflictions?
27 And why should I ayield to sin, because of my flesh? Yea, why should I give way to btemptations, that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my cpeace and afflict my soul? Why am I dangry because of mine enemy?
28 Awake, my soul! No longer adroop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart, and give place no more for the benemy of my soul.
29 Do not aanger again because of mine enemies. Do not slacken my strength because of mine afflictions.
30 Rejoice, O my aheart, and cry unto the Lord, and say: O Lord, I will praise thee forever; yea, my soul will rejoice in thee, my God, and the brock of my salvation.
31 O Lord, wilt thou aredeem my soul? Wilt thou deliver me out of the hands of mine enemies? Wilt thou make me that I may shake at the appearance of bsin?
32 May the gates of hell be shut continually before me, because that my aheart is broken and my spirit is contrite! O Lord, wilt thou not shut the gates of thy righteousness before me, that I may bwalk in the path of the low valley, that I may be strict in the plain road!
33 O Lord, wilt thou encircle me around in the robe of thy arighteousness! O Lord, wilt thou make a way for mine escape before mine benemies! Wilt thou make my path straight before me! Wilt thou not place a stumbling block in my way—but that thou wouldst clear my way before me, and hedge not up my way, but the ways of mine enemy.
34 O Lord, I have atrusted in thee, and I will btrust in thee forever. I will not put my ctrust in the arm of flesh; for I know that cursed is he that putteth his dtrust in the arm of flesh. Yea, cursed is he that putteth his trust in man or maketh flesh his arm.
35 Yea, I know that God will give aliberally to him that asketh. Yea, my God will give me, if I bask cnot amiss; therefore I will lift up my voice unto thee; yea, I will cry unto thee, my God, the drock of my erighteousness. Behold, my voice shall forever ascend up unto thee, my rock and mine everlasting God. Amen.
Talk about a emotional rollercoaster! Story of my life though. I realized I needed to change my thinking, I needed to be Christlike even more, and that included my prayers. Christ is seriously the best example for everything! Including prayers. Sister Watkins in Mission conference made us read the Bible Dictionary about prayer:
As soon as we learn the true relationship in which we stand toward God (namely, God is our Father, and we are His children), then at once prayer becomes natural and instinctive on our part (Matt. 7:7–11). Many of the so-called difficulties about prayer arise from forgetting this relationship. Prayer is the act by which the will of the Father and the will of the child are brought into correspondence with each other. The object of prayer is not to change the will of God but to secure for ourselves and for others blessings that God is already willing to grant but that are made conditional on our asking for them. Blessings require some work or effort on our part before we can obtain them. Prayer is a form of work and is an appointed means for obtaining the highest of all blessings.
There are many passages in the New Testament that teach the duty of prayer (Matt. 7:7; 26:41; Luke 18:1; 21:36; Eph. 6:18; Philip. 4:6; Col. 4:2; 1 Thes. 5:17, 25; 1 Tim. 2:1, 8). Christians are taught to pray in Christ’s name (John 14:13–14; 15:7, 16; 16:23–24). We pray in Christ’s name when our mind is the mind of Christ, and our wishes the wishes of Christ—when His words abide in us (John 15:7). We then ask for things it is possible for God to grant. Many prayers remain unanswered because they are not in Christ’s name at all; they in no way represent His mind but spring out of the selfishness of man’s heart.
And I was reading in the ensign about this woman! I'll just give you the talk cause it's amazing:
Ensign
Aug. 2006
Bending My Will to His
26908_000_018I’ve always loved the Old Testament account of Hannah and her long-awaited son, Samuel (see 1 Samuel 1–2). Hannah’s courage to give up her child to the service of God seemed a touching reminder of the strength of women. When we were expecting our first child, my husband and I decided long before our baby was born to name him Samuel. But it wasn’t until I almost had to give my son back to God that I realized I had Hannah’s story all wrong.
More than two months before my due date, we were visiting relatives hours away from home, and I began to hemorrhage at a shopping mall. I hadn’t felt Samuel move all day, and I feared the worst. On the way to the emergency room, I burst into tears. Would I be willing to give my son back to God as Hannah had done? Her story had always inspired me, but the lesson became more difficult to accept when it applied to my own life.
Less than two hours later, Samuel was born weighing three pounds and 14 ounces. He couldn’t breathe or eat on his own. Looking at his tiny body that night, I was still afraid he wouldn’t make it. His chest quivered from the ventilator. He couldn’t even cry because tubes blocked his vocal cords.
The next few days and weeks only became more difficult for me to handle. I was recovering from the emergency delivery, and my husband had to return home to finish the semester at the university. One night, during Samuel’s five-week hospital stay, I was overcome with loneliness. I prayed and asked God for blessing after blessing: “Please let my son be OK. Please help my husband with school. Please let us all be together soon.”
After I finished, I waited and wondered why I didn’t feel anything. Then it hit me what I was doing. If I asked to simply be handed everything I wanted, then where was my faith? I stopped focusing on my list of desired blessings, and a comforting feeling of reassurance came over me. I realized that everything I loved—my son, my husband, my home—could be taken away from me, but Heavenly Father would still be there.
I thought about Hannah. She wanted children more than anything, and she probably asked God for them many times. Perhaps she recognized, like me, that simply asking and waiting for blessings doesn’t help us grow. I realized that Hannah’s story wasn’t about giving up her son. She knew Samuel already belonged to God, as did my son and my husband. Hannah gave God the only thing any of us can give—her heart.
That night I vowed to give the Lord anything He asked of me. Instead of telling Him what I needed and waiting for those blessings to be fulfilled, I asked what He wanted me to do. I felt reassurance that I should be patient through my trial and trust in Him, that I should let my loneliness strengthen me.
Fortunately, we were able to keep our son. Samuel gets stronger every day and is a constant reminder of what I learned from his birth. I hope my little family will continue to grow as Hannah’s did and, with my Heavenly Father’s help, I’ll be able to keep them forever.
Prayer is a beautiful and wonderful thing. It is a communication between a Father and His child. But that is the key! Communication. I hate conversations when only the other person is talking. I want to say something! ANd I would hate if someone demanded something of me all the time. Sometimes we forget, the gifter of our agency, our kind loving Heavenly Father, has agency too. He has a life! He isn't a boring human being, He is an all knowing Father who if anyone has an answer or something to say, it's Him. ANd prayer isn't the only thing that stood out to me: "I realized that Hannah's story wasn't about giving up her son. SHe knew Samuel belonged to God. Hannah gave God the only thing any of us can give-her heart." I realized, that I belong to my God. I would gladly give my service forever to my Lord. Everything I have is his, inluding my mission. It's his anyway. Heavenly Father can keep me in San Jose take me to a different area, or ship me to a different country, it would be His will. And His will is much better than mine. ANd the Bible dictionary say: Prayer is the act by which the will of the Father and the will of the child are brought into correspondence with each other." Most of you are probably like: That's not fair, why doesn't he just give us what we want!" He does, but of the time when our will is His will too. He is taking away agency, he isn't punishing us. He is helping us. And at times, he does grant us our "selfish" desires. But they usually don't work out. Think of the Parable of the Prodigal son.
Heavenly Father loves us so much. We might think why isn't he helping me? But we can just give Him our hearts and bend our will to his, and then we would be able to see the blessings.
Enough of my little soap box. Haha. Y'all know I am not perfect.
And I am not perfect at all at this. I have to pray everyday for help so that my will is his will.
On Thursday, we had a pretty rotten day. No one answered the door even when they were home. And then the on person who did was in love with "Michele" and not the gospel. And a stinky toot! But I have to remember HEavenly Father loves stinky toots too. But H must get frustrated with them. DInner with the Marchucks made our day better though. We taught them in portuguese and spanish. IT was fun. Friday was a good day. We got a new investigator named Tyler! He said he would be baptized. And we talked to an awesome kid who is less active. I haver realized how important it s to teach members and reactivate them. Member missionary work is so impoartant! Member's do so much and have so much influence on Missionary Work. Sometimes being an example isn't enough, you have to open your mouth. LIke Mosiah 18:8-9. Missionary work for members inludes helping other members too. What I wouldn't give to go back in time and know the things I know now. I wish I had been a better missionary before. Why wouldn't you want to share the gospel with everyone? You might not have the tag, but when you are baptized, you take the name of Christ on you forever. I take my tag off in about 16 months! How short! But how long is my calling as a child of God and the Sister of those I surround myself with. (All of this was written before Mission Conference)
Saturday was about the same. No one answered. We went to a baptism though. And then we went to this park where it was filled with all asian people. It was the best thing of my life. Everyone was so happy! I love contacting happy people surrounded by their families. No one spoke English, but they were all just so willing to take a Mormon.org card. I was like a perfect world. I love that park. Just picture rainbows, butterflies, and happy families and you got that park. It was such an awesome relieving feeling. And then we got home, and I go the news. I was being transferred. I was amazed how calm I was until I was alone. I sometimes just don't know what the Lord is teaching me. In the MTC, Sister Corbitt left. In the MTC, everyone found out their reassingments before me. IN the MTC, everyone left before me. Alex left before me, my District. It was like a gaping hole. ANd then I am sent to California, and I get Sister Hall and Sister Jones, and I make awesome friends with Sister Packer and SIster Koford, I start to fall in love with the people I am teaching, and then the Lord decides out of all the VIsa Waiters, I am being the emergency transfer. ANd then I meet Sister BRadshaw, SIster Green, and SIster Zidek. ANd I love them. THe Lord Helped Sister Zidek and I so much.
She is a wonderful missionary and companion. And I devoted so much time to the people. I have tried to learn Spanihs, I have tried to speak, I have tried to serve the Lord, investigators, my companions, and all I can think is: Did I do enough?
Sister Zidek better get the best companion ever, because all the ones she has gotten has been rotten. Including me. I just love everyone so much. I am going to miss them. My heart really hurts. Giving your heart and will and trust to the Lord is so hard. Especially when you love. I wonder if that is what the Savior felt. I have no doubt he know he would see His friends again, but they would be different and so would he. In a way, I bet he liked being Jesus of Nazareth. No doubt he loved everyone he served. And then he did the greates act for them and us. "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." He must have had some pain in his heart too.
I love that if I try, I can relate every aspect of my life to His. love Him so much. And I love the atonement. His love and sacrifice, and his life is enough to fill every hole. He is my best friend and my constant companion. LIke the story, everything can be taken away, but I will always have my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. I will always love the people I have met here, and I might not understand what God is trying to teach me, but I am grateful that I have been test. It hurts, but no one ever said trying to change the position of your heart would be easy. That's why lately I have really loved the song "come thou fount of every blessing"
Come thou fount of every blessing
Tune my heart to sing thy grace
Streams of mercy never ceasing
Call for songs of loudest praise
Teach me some melodious sonnet
Sung by flaming tongues above
I'll praise the mount I'm fixed upon it
Mount of thy redeeming love
Here I raise my Ebenezer
Hither by thy help I come
And I hope by thy good pleasure
Safely to arrive at home
Jesus sought me when a stranger
Wondering from the fold of God
He, to rescue me from danger
Interposed His precious blood
O to grace how great a debtor daily I'm constrained to be!
Let thy goodness like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to thee
Prone to wander Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love
Here's my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above
The lyrics reflect my life right now. I love y'all so much! Sorry all this was so scattered. Sunday was awesome by the way. Try explaining you didn't get your visa in Spanish: "Nao Visa! Otro area aqui!!"
I love y'all. I am so happy to be here! I'll let y'all know my new address. Read your scriptures! Pray, do missionary work, and love the Lord with all your heart!
Love,
Sister Powell
19 And when I desire to rejoice, my heart groaneth because of my sins; nevertheless, I know in whom I have atrusted.
20 My God hath been my asupport; he hath led me through mine bafflictions in the wilderness; and he hath preserved me upon the waters of the great deep.
21 He hath filled me with his alove, even unto the bconsuming of my flesh.
22 He hath confounded mine aenemies, unto the causing of them to quake before me.
23 Behold, he hath heard my cry by day, and he hath given me aknowledge by bvisions in the night-time.
24 And by day have I waxed bold in mighty aprayer before him; yea, my voice have I sent up on high; and angels came down and ministered unto me.
25 And upon the wings of his Spirit hath my body been acarried away upon exceedingly high mountains. And mine eyes have beheld great things, yea, even too great for man; therefore I was bidden that I should not write them.
26 O then, if I have seen so great things, if the Lord in his condescension unto the children of men hath avisited men in so much bmercy, cwhy should my dheart weep and my soul linger in the valley of sorrow, and my flesh waste away, and my strength slacken, because of mine afflictions?
27 And why should I ayield to sin, because of my flesh? Yea, why should I give way to btemptations, that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my cpeace and afflict my soul? Why am I dangry because of mine enemy?
28 Awake, my soul! No longer adroop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart, and give place no more for the benemy of my soul.
29 Do not aanger again because of mine enemies. Do not slacken my strength because of mine afflictions.
30 Rejoice, O my aheart, and cry unto the Lord, and say: O Lord, I will praise thee forever; yea, my soul will rejoice in thee, my God, and the brock of my salvation.
31 O Lord, wilt thou aredeem my soul? Wilt thou deliver me out of the hands of mine enemies? Wilt thou make me that I may shake at the appearance of bsin?
32 May the gates of hell be shut continually before me, because that my aheart is broken and my spirit is contrite! O Lord, wilt thou not shut the gates of thy righteousness before me, that I may bwalk in the path of the low valley, that I may be strict in the plain road!
33 O Lord, wilt thou encircle me around in the robe of thy arighteousness! O Lord, wilt thou make a way for mine escape before mine benemies! Wilt thou make my path straight before me! Wilt thou not place a stumbling block in my way—but that thou wouldst clear my way before me, and hedge not up my way, but the ways of mine enemy.
34 O Lord, I have atrusted in thee, and I will btrust in thee forever. I will not put my ctrust in the arm of flesh; for I know that cursed is he that putteth his dtrust in the arm of flesh. Yea, cursed is he that putteth his trust in man or maketh flesh his arm.
35 Yea, I know that God will give aliberally to him that asketh. Yea, my God will give me, if I bask cnot amiss; therefore I will lift up my voice unto thee; yea, I will cry unto thee, my God, the drock of my erighteousness. Behold, my voice shall forever ascend up unto thee, my rock and mine everlasting God. Amen.
Talk about a emotional rollercoaster! Story of my life though. I realized I needed to change my thinking, I needed to be Christlike even more, and that included my prayers. Christ is seriously the best example for everything! Including prayers. Sister Watkins in Mission conference made us read the Bible Dictionary about prayer:
As soon as we learn the true relationship in which we stand toward God (namely, God is our Father, and we are His children), then at once prayer becomes natural and instinctive on our part (Matt. 7:7–11). Many of the so-called difficulties about prayer arise from forgetting this relationship. Prayer is the act by which the will of the Father and the will of the child are brought into correspondence with each other. The object of prayer is not to change the will of God but to secure for ourselves and for others blessings that God is already willing to grant but that are made conditional on our asking for them. Blessings require some work or effort on our part before we can obtain them. Prayer is a form of work and is an appointed means for obtaining the highest of all blessings.
There are many passages in the New Testament that teach the duty of prayer (Matt. 7:7; 26:41; Luke 18:1; 21:36; Eph. 6:18; Philip. 4:6; Col. 4:2; 1 Thes. 5:17, 25; 1 Tim. 2:1, 8). Christians are taught to pray in Christ’s name (John 14:13–14; 15:7, 16; 16:23–24). We pray in Christ’s name when our mind is the mind of Christ, and our wishes the wishes of Christ—when His words abide in us (John 15:7). We then ask for things it is possible for God to grant. Many prayers remain unanswered because they are not in Christ’s name at all; they in no way represent His mind but spring out of the selfishness of man’s heart.
And I was reading in the ensign about this woman! I'll just give you the talk cause it's amazing:
Bending My Will to His
By Arianne Baadsgaard Cope
More than two months before my due date, we were visiting relatives hours away from home, and I began to hemorrhage at a shopping mall. I hadn’t felt Samuel move all day, and I feared the worst. On the way to the emergency room, I burst into tears. Would I be willing to give my son back to God as Hannah had done? Her story had always inspired me, but the lesson became more difficult to accept when it applied to my own life.
Less than two hours later, Samuel was born weighing three pounds and 14 ounces. He couldn’t breathe or eat on his own. Looking at his tiny body that night, I was still afraid he wouldn’t make it. His chest quivered from the ventilator. He couldn’t even cry because tubes blocked his vocal cords.
The next few days and weeks only became more difficult for me to handle. I was recovering from the emergency delivery, and my husband had to return home to finish the semester at the university. One night, during Samuel’s five-week hospital stay, I was overcome with loneliness. I prayed and asked God for blessing after blessing: “Please let my son be OK. Please help my husband with school. Please let us all be together soon.”
After I finished, I waited and wondered why I didn’t feel anything. Then it hit me what I was doing. If I asked to simply be handed everything I wanted, then where was my faith? I stopped focusing on my list of desired blessings, and a comforting feeling of reassurance came over me. I realized that everything I loved—my son, my husband, my home—could be taken away from me, but Heavenly Father would still be there.
I thought about Hannah. She wanted children more than anything, and she probably asked God for them many times. Perhaps she recognized, like me, that simply asking and waiting for blessings doesn’t help us grow. I realized that Hannah’s story wasn’t about giving up her son. She knew Samuel already belonged to God, as did my son and my husband. Hannah gave God the only thing any of us can give—her heart.
That night I vowed to give the Lord anything He asked of me. Instead of telling Him what I needed and waiting for those blessings to be fulfilled, I asked what He wanted me to do. I felt reassurance that I should be patient through my trial and trust in Him, that I should let my loneliness strengthen me.
Fortunately, we were able to keep our son. Samuel gets stronger every day and is a constant reminder of what I learned from his birth. I hope my little family will continue to grow as Hannah’s did and, with my Heavenly Father’s help, I’ll be able to keep them forever.
Prayer is a beautiful and wonderful thing. It is a communication between a Father and His child. But that is the key! Communication. I hate conversations when only the other person is talking. I want to say something! ANd I would hate if someone demanded something of me all the time. Sometimes we forget, the gifter of our agency, our kind loving Heavenly Father, has agency too. He has a life! He isn't a boring human being, He is an all knowing Father who if anyone has an answer or something to say, it's Him. ANd prayer isn't the only thing that stood out to me: "I realized that Hannah's story wasn't about giving up her son. SHe knew Samuel belonged to God. Hannah gave God the only thing any of us can give-her heart." I realized, that I belong to my God. I would gladly give my service forever to my Lord. Everything I have is his, inluding my mission. It's his anyway. Heavenly Father can keep me in San Jose take me to a different area, or ship me to a different country, it would be His will. And His will is much better than mine. ANd the Bible dictionary say: Prayer is the act by which the will of the Father and the will of the child are brought into correspondence with each other." Most of you are probably like: That's not fair, why doesn't he just give us what we want!" He does, but of the time when our will is His will too. He is taking away agency, he isn't punishing us. He is helping us. And at times, he does grant us our "selfish" desires. But they usually don't work out. Think of the Parable of the Prodigal son.
Heavenly Father loves us so much. We might think why isn't he helping me? But we can just give Him our hearts and bend our will to his, and then we would be able to see the blessings.
Enough of my little soap box. Haha. Y'all know I am not perfect.
And I am not perfect at all at this. I have to pray everyday for help so that my will is his will.
On Thursday, we had a pretty rotten day. No one answered the door even when they were home. And then the on person who did was in love with "Michele" and not the gospel. And a stinky toot! But I have to remember HEavenly Father loves stinky toots too. But H must get frustrated with them. DInner with the Marchucks made our day better though. We taught them in portuguese and spanish. IT was fun. Friday was a good day. We got a new investigator named Tyler! He said he would be baptized. And we talked to an awesome kid who is less active. I haver realized how important it s to teach members and reactivate them. Member missionary work is so impoartant! Member's do so much and have so much influence on Missionary Work. Sometimes being an example isn't enough, you have to open your mouth. LIke Mosiah 18:8-9. Missionary work for members inludes helping other members too. What I wouldn't give to go back in time and know the things I know now. I wish I had been a better missionary before. Why wouldn't you want to share the gospel with everyone? You might not have the tag, but when you are baptized, you take the name of Christ on you forever. I take my tag off in about 16 months! How short! But how long is my calling as a child of God and the Sister of those I surround myself with. (All of this was written before Mission Conference)
Saturday was about the same. No one answered. We went to a baptism though. And then we went to this park where it was filled with all asian people. It was the best thing of my life. Everyone was so happy! I love contacting happy people surrounded by their families. No one spoke English, but they were all just so willing to take a Mormon.org card. I was like a perfect world. I love that park. Just picture rainbows, butterflies, and happy families and you got that park. It was such an awesome relieving feeling. And then we got home, and I go the news. I was being transferred. I was amazed how calm I was until I was alone. I sometimes just don't know what the Lord is teaching me. In the MTC, Sister Corbitt left. In the MTC, everyone found out their reassingments before me. IN the MTC, everyone left before me. Alex left before me, my District. It was like a gaping hole. ANd then I am sent to California, and I get Sister Hall and Sister Jones, and I make awesome friends with Sister Packer and SIster Koford, I start to fall in love with the people I am teaching, and then the Lord decides out of all the VIsa Waiters, I am being the emergency transfer. ANd then I meet Sister BRadshaw, SIster Green, and SIster Zidek. ANd I love them. THe Lord Helped Sister Zidek and I so much.
She is a wonderful missionary and companion. And I devoted so much time to the people. I have tried to learn Spanihs, I have tried to speak, I have tried to serve the Lord, investigators, my companions, and all I can think is: Did I do enough?
Sister Zidek better get the best companion ever, because all the ones she has gotten has been rotten. Including me. I just love everyone so much. I am going to miss them. My heart really hurts. Giving your heart and will and trust to the Lord is so hard. Especially when you love. I wonder if that is what the Savior felt. I have no doubt he know he would see His friends again, but they would be different and so would he. In a way, I bet he liked being Jesus of Nazareth. No doubt he loved everyone he served. And then he did the greates act for them and us. "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." He must have had some pain in his heart too.
I love that if I try, I can relate every aspect of my life to His. love Him so much. And I love the atonement. His love and sacrifice, and his life is enough to fill every hole. He is my best friend and my constant companion. LIke the story, everything can be taken away, but I will always have my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. I will always love the people I have met here, and I might not understand what God is trying to teach me, but I am grateful that I have been test. It hurts, but no one ever said trying to change the position of your heart would be easy. That's why lately I have really loved the song "come thou fount of every blessing"
Come thou fount of every blessing
Tune my heart to sing thy grace
Streams of mercy never ceasing
Call for songs of loudest praise
Teach me some melodious sonnet
Sung by flaming tongues above
I'll praise the mount I'm fixed upon it
Mount of thy redeeming love
Here I raise my Ebenezer
Hither by thy help I come
And I hope by thy good pleasure
Safely to arrive at home
Jesus sought me when a stranger
Wondering from the fold of God
He, to rescue me from danger
Interposed His precious blood
O to grace how great a debtor daily I'm constrained to be!
Let thy goodness like a fetter, bind my wandering heart to thee
Prone to wander Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love
Here's my heart, O take and seal it, seal it for thy courts above
The lyrics reflect my life right now. I love y'all so much! Sorry all this was so scattered. Sunday was awesome by the way. Try explaining you didn't get your visa in Spanish: "Nao Visa! Otro area aqui!!"
I love y'all. I am so happy to be here! I'll let y'all know my new address. Read your scriptures! Pray, do missionary work, and love the Lord with all your heart!
Love,
Sister Powell
No comments
Post a Comment